WaPo’s Jennifer Rubin acts on principle, decides to keep job and keep household birds happy

Washington Post columnist Jennifer Rubin has had second thoughts about calling those who quit the Los Angeles Times heroes following the paper’s decision not to endorse a presidential candidate this year.  A few days later, her own employer followed suit with its non-endorsement.  This left Rubin with a dilemma: act on the principle she proscribes to others or continue to be the hack she has been for years.  Her continued employment at the Washington Post provides the answer.

“Did I say that?” she responded when asked about her praise for resignations at the Los Angeles Times while chiding others there to do the same.  “I mean, it’s a totally different situation.  There, the paper decided not to make any presidential endorsement, while here the paper decided not to make any presidential endorsement.  See, can’t you see the difference?”

Rubin did point out that she and several other columnists did pen a letter of protest saying it was a bad thing, but, unfortunately, nobody read it.

“Nobody reads what I write, it’s like I don’t even exist,’ she said.  “Sure, some household birds might catch a glimpse of one of my columns now and then, but that’s usually at the bottom of their birdcage.”

Rubin did point out that she thinks Washington Post readers need to be told how to vote, otherwise, how would they know?

“Sure, everybody knows that a newspaper’s presidential endorsement is worth about as much as a bottle of P Diddy’s cologne these days, but it’s the point of the thing.  What we know is that Washington Post subscribers are idiots, much like its columnists, so we need to tell them how to vote.  If they had any brains, they wouldn’t be subscribers.”

But, about that resignation many thought for sure would follow, given what she said about the Los Angeles Times employees.  What gives?

“Uh, well, you see, it’s sort of like this,” she began.  “Um, I like being a newspaper hack and I don’t know anything about Substack, so I would probably starve.  And if I had any principles, I wouldn’t be a hack writing for the Washington Post.  I’m not like Taylor Lorenz, who’s ever dumber than me.  She’s going to Substack and maybe somebody will pay for her whining there.  I don’t think anybody would pay for my whining, except some household birds, maybe.