The presidential election season, much like every season of the National Hockey League, feels like it never ends. This year is no different. Yet, some individuals are looking to the moon for some relief, as the exchange below indicates.
Greg: Hi, neighbor. How are things going?
Lou: Another day another seventy-five cents. Inflation, you know.
Greg: Tell me about it. Just got back from McDonald’s. I got one of those new value meals, you know, the one for five bucks.
Lou: How was it?
Greg: I had to super-size it just to get meat on the burger. That cost three more dollars. Unbelievable.
Lou: Was it really meat?
Greg: Well, it was meat-ish. But, that’s not the point. You watching the debate tonight?
Lou: Nah. I’m tired of the campaign already. It’s only June but it’s dragged on for months. It feels like it’ll never end.
Greg: I know what you mean. I wish we could just skip ahead to November already.
Lou: That’s why I’m headed to the moon.
Greg: What? The moon? Why? When?
Lou: On Saturday.
Greg: How are you getting there?
Lou: That Elon Musk, he’s into everything. You see, on the moon, each day is 56 microseconds shorter than on Earth. Election day in November will get here just a bit faster.
Greg: That seems a bit extreme. Couldn’t you just use some PTO and rent a cabin or something?
Lou: And have to live through those extra 56 microseconds every day of the presidential campaign season on Earth? Not a chance. And you know, there’s an equator on the moon too.
Greg: Get out.
Lou: I’m not kidding. The equator on the moon gets about 14 days of sunlight followed by 14 days of darkness.
Greg: Darkness for 14 straight days? That sounds depressing, kind of like being in Oakland.
Lou: It does seem a bit like being at an A’s game, doesn’t it?
Greg: But it’s got to be pretty expensive. Is it worth it to save 56 microseconds a day?
Lou: Look, this whole election season is already depressing. Add to that the lousy economy, the border, Ukraine, climate protesters at golf tournaments, the whole bit. They sent some people to the moon a few weeks ago. Some climate protester glued herself to the spacecraft. She fell off shortly after takeoff. Landed on a house in Boca Raton, I heard.
Anyway, I’m pretty tired of the whole damn thing. The moon seems pretty appealing about now.
Greg: I get your point.
Lou: Why don’t you come?
Greg: Uh, I don’t know.
Lou: Could be some of the greatest 56 microseconds of your life.
Greg: I get 14 straight days of sunlight, right?
Lou: At the equator.
Greg: And 56 microseconds faster?
Lou: Every day.
Greg: I’m in.
Lou: Great. Be sure to pack a lunch for the trip. And bring some snacks too.
Thanks Curtice! Over the moon, and beyond! Note: I watched this on 1.25 speed. https://rumble.com/v53v889--war-correspondent-special-report-with-kerry-cassidy-and-jean-claude-june-2.html?mref=6zof&mrefc=3